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21 Things I've Learned This Summer (From 8/12/14)
- That I really don’t have natural
love for those who are difficult, don’t help themselves, are ignorant and
demanding, annoying, socially inept, who’s culture I don’t relate to, etc,
etc. In short, without Jesus I really
only love those who I relate to well, respect, make me feel good etc. I do not have natural love for the “least of
these.” And if I “love” only those, is
that even love? More like
selfishness… In short, I’m learning more
how selfish I am without Jesus.
- That God really does want to give
me the desires of my heart. It’s just
taken awhile to realize that what I desire most deeply is Him (yeah, and
there’s a neat story there :)).
- Temptations are really just God
given desires for something good that the devil takes and perverts (James
1:12-17). Instead of just fleeing
temptation, ask, “What is my soul really longing for that I need Jesus to fill?
- The power of “choosing”
Jesus. When I’m tempted, when I’m
doubting, when I’m down, when I really want to do my own thing, I can
choose. I may not feel like it. I may not want it. But I’ve seen the power this summer of reaching
out anyways and saying, “But Jesus, I choose You.” I have seen God work miracles and victories
in my own heart with that simple, sometimes even half-hearted, decision to
choose.
- That when I’m following Jesus I
can still make mistakes. They may not
even be sins, but following God doesn’t mean I suddenly won’t make any dumb,
even well-meaning, mistakes. I can and
will still hurt people (ugh..). But these
are opportunities to “own” my actions in humility and learn to ask forgiveness
and make things right. It’s the stuff of
real relationships.
- That being open and vulnerable
about my own struggles and mistakes is something I need to do more often. I think we long for that “realness” in the
church. And it’s risky, it takes wisdom,
and it can hurt. But it’s also the key
to community and relationships that are more than superficial. And the more God heals and hold my heart, the
more I’m finding I can do this.
- How powerful it is to praise the
Lord and how much I’m prone to doubt if I don’t. Remembering what God’s done (regularly) and
praising Him even for what He’s going to do, by faith, though I don’t see it
now, has become such a powerful weapon against my doubtful and sometimes
pessimistic nature. (Claiming God’s promises is big with this too).
- That outhouses get old after a
week or so ;)
- How self-preserving and not
others-centered I can get when my basic needs aren’t met – I don’t get a
shower, I need sleep, my stuff isn’t secure, my finances aren’t secure, I’m
hungry, etc. I understand better now the
greed can come with poverty.
- I’m not the nicest person when I’m
hungry… :p (related to above…)
- That caring about and investing in
people is worth it, even if it hurts later.
- The power of being treated well,
feeling valued, being encouraged, prayed for, etc. We long to have someone in our corner. To be special. Jesus made me to care and be cared for, and
whether I can fully experience that right now or not (at least in the human
realm), the desire is natural and God-given.
- The power of loving Jesus
more. When I’ve really wanted something,
I’ve started to pray, “But Jesus, I want you more.” Then my desires can be held in open hands
instead of clinched fists. I’m learning
to trust Him to give me back or give me better.
And the best has been realizing that my connection with Him IS something
I want more.
- That God really does give good
gifts to His children (Mat 7:11, Ps. 103:5)
- That leaving things in open hands
to God takes away a lot of fear and allows me to take risks. I can fear so much making the wrong
decisions, getting into bad relationships, being fooled, taken advantage of,
etc. But if it’s God’s to give or take,
if I’m willing to listen, He WILL protect me.
- That even though I hate messes,
people and relationships are a mess worth making.
- That I can learn a whole lot from
people if I really stop to listen. And that
sometimes I don’t listen because I’m too busy thinking about myself…
- That if I want to have healthy
relationships, I need to quit downplaying and “sabotaging” myself. That’s not real humility and not from the
Lord.
- That my prayer life has
transformed my spiritual life and connection with God. Mercy, this seems so
cliché… But if you ask me, I’d love to
explain how God’s been helping me to find a new communion with Him, freedom of
soul, and deeper faith, all revolving around my prayer life. Lord, let me not forget…
- The power of tasting something
good. I understand more how it’s the
goodness of God that leads to repentance.
When I’ve experienced something really good, I don’t want to leave and
go back.
- That I am still, every day, only
one step, one choice, away from who I was. Even with all I’ve “learned,” I can
be off this track in an instant without Jesus. The old life is right around the corner. Lest I think more highly of myself or my
spirituality than I should, I must remember that the only good in me is
Jesus. And the only way to keep Him is
to choose Him again. Today.
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